Iraq War symbolically over

WASHINGTON, D.C. (AP)--The Democratic-controlled House of Representatives issued a symbolic rejection of President Bush's decision to dump more troops into his Iraq quagmire on Friday, opening an epic confrontation between Congress and commander in chief over a disastrous and illegal war that has taken the lives of more than 3,100 U.S. troops and left 20,000 more maimed for life.

The vote on the pointless nonbinding measure was 246-182, and within minutes, Democrats said their next move would be to challenge Bush's request for $93 billion in new funds for the Carlyle Group.

Twisting recent comments by Democrats, Bush's Republican goons said repeatedly the measure would lead to attempts to cut off food and ammunition for the troops and leave them to die in the desert with no way to charge their iPods.

"Now it's time to stand up for my friends who did not make it home, and for those who fought and died in Iraq already," said GOP Representative Sam Johnson of Texas, who was a prisoner of war in Vietnam and should know better. "We must not cut funding for our friends in the defense industry. We must stick by them," he added, snapping off a salute as he completed his remarks to yet another kneejerk ovation.

Moving quickly, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) set a test vote for Saturday on an identical measure, and several presidential contenders in both parties were forced to rearrange their weekend campaign schedules to be present and do their fucking job.

The House vote completed a turnabout from the fall of 2002, when the House bowed, 296-133, to Bush's request to authorize military action against Iraqi ruler Saddam Hussein as soon as evidence could be fabricated indicating that he was a threat to the U.S.

U.S.-led troops made quick work of his regime but soon discovered it was the only thing keeping long-suppressed sectarian rivalries from boiling over into full-fledged civil war. Hundreds of thousands of Iraqis have died in the ensuing war, along with more than 3,100 U.S. troops.

Bush made no comment on the developments in the House, and his spokesman said the president was too drunk to watch the proceedings on television.

Bush has already said passage of the measure will not deter him from proceeding with the deployment of another 21,500 troops, designed primarily to make John McCain stop complaining.

Bush and his flunkies in Congress calculated days ago that the House measure would pass, and increasingly have focused their energy on attacking the next step in the Democrats' attempt to end U.S. participation in the war, which is to stop paying for it.

"The President believes that the Congress should provide the full funding and flexibility the defense industry needs to thrive and prosper," said White House Channel anchorman Tony Snow.

Democrats have indicated they will use Bush's spending request to impose certain standards of readiness, training and rest for the troops, which Republicans say proves how much they hate them.

"This is all part of their plan to eliminate funding for our troops that are in harm's way and just leave them over there with no dinner and no way home. And we stand here as Republicans...committed to making sure our troops in harm's way have all the funds and equipment they need to survive witnessing this civil war in Iraq," said John Boehner of Ohio, pretending to choke back tears.